Uuh, Eeeh, Ohhh

Wow! I am writing in my blog again. This is unheard of. Sometimes I just feel that is so much to say, that it would be impossible to write down in words what I feel and I give up and I start thinking about it. But that's not true only for writing. How many times haven't I repressed my feelings and didn't say anything just because of societal constraints. There are so many ways to verbalize or jot down an idea, a feeling or a state of mind and I feel so little in the big scheme of things. There are millions of words, that can be arranged in trillions of combinations. How can I possibly find the right combination of words that will perfectly project my thoughts into this critical world. It's like breaking a 100 digit code of a cipher? Mathematically it sounds impossible. But there's nothing worst than keeping all the ideas and feelings locked in my mind. The sleep of reason will give birth to monsters, some french once said. And he was right. And that's why I am sitting in front of this computer writing all this instead of going to bed. That's why I play with this cipher lock, plugging in numbers based on flair hoping that I will get it right one day. Practice and perseverence. And the funny thing is, that sonds so much like the boy looking for his fortune in the Alchemist. The treasure, the philosophical stone is right next to you but you never paid enough attention.